jack of all....master of none

Sleepless in chennai

2008-05-05T11:30:00.000-07:00

Here i am again, its midnight and i'm nowhere close to feeling sleepy..although i feel really tired, i guess insomnia caused by stress is the most terrible disease that is plaguing this generation. Just got back from a trip to coimbatore, pollachi and valparai...had a lot of fun, visited the isha temple, it was an amazing experience. Tomorrow is going to be another looong boring day at the office! There are so many things i want to blog about but i'm having trouble wording my thoughts, i do hope i manage to overcome this block eventually. For now i am just going to post this really funny joke i read on the net :-)

***
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”
I said “WHAT???!!! What was that?!”

So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear…
“You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.” She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?”
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her we’ll just buy them all.
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you, she was so excited, she must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all dear, lets go to the cashier.”
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel like it.”
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled “WHAT??!!!” I then said “Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.”
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?”

Apparently I won’t be having sex again until sometime after pigs fly over a frozen hell. [Cheeky Monkey]

Harrased by the police

2008-03-14T13:15:00.000-07:00

After a long boring week, my friend and i decided to do some driving around the town today, although there isn't much to do in Chennai after 12am, we drove upto ascendas in tharamani bought some cigarettes and decided to go to the beach. The weather was beautiful, and the beach was pretty must deserted except for the stray dogs which were fast asleep. Half way through our cigarettes there was this police car that pulled up beside us, we thought it would be the usual cops screaming out orders to people wanting them to vacate the beach immediately. But I guess these two were quite jobless and wanted to harass someone and found two unsuspecting targets to make fun off, and possibly make some money. They started off by claiming that we were both drunk, and were planning to have sex in the beach (I just couldn't control my laughter!), and then it followed with the usual 'where do u work?', 'whats ur salary' questions and then we were administered the special 'software engineer' treatment. The software people have always been harassed, right from auto drivers, to banks, to real estate guys and landlords and now even the cops find a special sadistic pleasure in belittling us! After various threats ranging from 'night at the lock-up' to 'cancellation of license' we were finally allowed to leave with a warning that venturing out at this time of the night could prove very dangerous, ironically the only trouble we experienced was from the cops themselves!

I'm sure every one us who has ever gone for a night show or a night out at the city, has been harassed by the cops at some time or the other, its quite irritating to think that the very people who are supposed to protect us end up causing us the most trouble. Maybe the city is as dangerous as the cops claim it to be, and they must be given credit for making it a safe place to live in, but most of the cops I have run into do not give this impression, there are mainly 5 of cops that I have come accross

The vasool cop: This guy's sole intention is to take money from you, he'll go through the entire vehicle, its papers, its occupants and find the silliest reason to fine you, its very easy to find this guy, signal has one of them.

The whiny cop: This cop is so pissed with life that he would complain about his problems even to you, and will be very unforgiving with people who appear to be happier of more well-off than him, the only way to escape him is make him believe that your life is more miserable than his and take care that you get off your bike when he's speaking to you, put off your cigarette and not attend calls while he's around

The daddy cop: This guy is so full of advice, you actually tend to like him! He will give you advice about everything under sky, from traffic rules to vehicle maintainance to job security. But can be quite irritating when all this happens in the middle of the night

The honest cop: Well if any of you actually meet one of this kind do let me know

The lady cop: Possibly the most annoying of the lot, like they say 'the female of the species is deadlier than the male'. I've had a lot of trouble with a particular policewoman on old mahabalipuram road, she is the most corrupt, arrogant, power misusing woman I've ever seen (maybe i'm exaggerating...but she's more or less that). I was actually caught for not carrying papers and she expected me to give her my id card and then go home and get the papers. I refused to do it (it was after a looong day of work and I was in no mood to ride all the way home and back) and we were arguing till 4 in the morning, but I was very happy at the end cos she said 'its people like you who make this job miserable' :-)

Well I guess there is nothing much that can be done about these wretched people, except hope to become a very powerful politician, or a rich businessman with lots of contacts, and have your revenge!!!

Maha Shivaratri

2008-03-07T21:47:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was mahashivaratri, the night of shiva, and being a hardcore shiva I too decided to spend the night at the temple. Although in my family it has never been an event of importance I decided I'd take up the fast, which i did manage to succeed in, thanks to the grace of the 3 eyed lord. It was 9pm when I reached the marundeeswar temple in thiruvanmyur and met my friend who was already in the darshan queue, (there was enormous queue that extended way beyond the main temple wall) being a crowd-hater I decided to wait till the line was shorter before going for the darshan (After all you will be able to see him only when he wills it). I went and seated my self at the 'entertainment section' of the temple rea group of children were getting ready to sing, they sang mostly carnatic songs and bhajans, after which there was a performance by the art of living people, which was very dissappointing for they had these hi fi instruments but sang only 3 songs which were only repetions of the same one line and left. Following this there was this guy who gave us a discourse on the 5 letter mantra (namah shivaya) and by then people had made the entire area a picnic spot, there was everything from cofee, tea, snacks, bedsheets, thick rugs, and people filling every available space to sleep. My friend got a call on his mobile and when he walked away from the noise to speak, he noticed that the paid darshan line was very short, so we decided to have our darshan. We had a peaceful darshan inspite of the minor chaos that reigned inside the temple due to people scuffling to get a better view. On our way out we realized that there was another discourse happening on the other side, so found a place to seat ourselves there. This one was really good and there was this guy speaking about the shivalingam, it was truly enlightening. He spoke about what the parts of the lingam represents, the story of lingothbavar, the types of lingams and lots of other saivite philosophy. If you do happen to visit the temple do attend the discourses that are given at 7pm daily on thiruvasagam and other shaivaite teachings.At about 12:30 i realized i was really hungry and my stomach was making noises, so decided to stick around till1:00 (thats when the thithi was supposed to end), and went home after that. I performed poojas to the shivalingam at home had a nice midnight meal and watched thiruvilayadal that was playing on tv and finally fell asleep at 2:30. This shivratri was truly a different experience, although i did not stay awake the whole night since I had to be in office at 9 am the next day, it did make me feel spiritually charged (i guess thats the whole point anyways).

Om namahshivaya!!!

The Ramayan

2008-02-17T07:08:00.000-08:00

The Ramayana is an Indian epic that is supposed to have been written more than 2000 years ago, by the sage Valmiki. Although it has existed for so many millennia, it still enthralls millions around the world just as it did during the time of its conception. I am no expert in the Ramayana, the limited knowledge I have about it comes from the Ramayana that was broadcast in doordarshan in 80s, the children’s version written by Rajaji and the Ashok Banker series (this one is really amazing!). The Ramayana is supposed to give every reader a different account about life, to some it is the story of the ‘ideal man’, to some it is a story about overcoming obstacles in life, to some it is the symbolic reunion of the soul with god…it all depends on how you interpret the story and the stories within the story. I have always believed that this epic symbolizes the battle that is waged in our minds, in order to facilitate the reunion of the jivathma (soul) with the paramathma (god). I have found numerous instances in the epic, especially in the sundarakand and yudhkand, which allegorically asserts this. There are numerous books that explain this particular aspect in detail; I just intend to state the same here, with a little addition of my own.

The characters:

Ram: He is the personification of all the good qualities in a human being. His qualities as a good son, a faithful husband, a just king and a true friend are some of his characteristics as the ideal man. Symbolically he represents the paramathma, being the incarnation of lord Vishnu.

Sita: She is again the ideal woman, and possesses the characteristics that are to be expected from a good wife and daughter. Her character may seem a little alien to today’s culture, and emulating her may seem ridiculous to most women but that’s only because there aren’t many Rams these days J. She is mostly dismissed as being too submissive and timid but she must be given credit for the iron will that she possessed to shun every move made by Ravan, to force her into submission, it was in fact Sita who weakened him mentally and spiritually by not succumbing to his power. Symbolically she represents the jivathma, which is yearning to unite with the paramathma (Ram).

Hanuman: My favourite character from the Ramayan, he is the incarnation of lord Shiva, and the son of the wind god, a celibate, and the greatest devotee of lord Ram. He is most instrumental in uniting Ram with Sita, so much so that even today separated couples are asked to read the sundarakand (a part of the Ramayan named after lord Hanuman) to be reunited. He symbolizes the unwavering devotion towards god that a spiritual seeker must possess and is the personification of bhakthi, strength, courage, knowledge and humility.

Ravana: The demon king of lanka, a very great devotee of lord Shiva (it is ironic that his downfall was hastened by an incarnation of Shiva), his rule extended to the three worlds and even managed to bring under his control the navagrahas. He was very well versed in the arts and scriptures, and was a master of the ‘rudra veena’ but his greatest flaw was his ego and was often depicted with ten heads (probably an indicative that he had an ego ten times that of a normal person?). His character symbolizes the ego that entraps the soul, and needs to be destroyed for the soul to be united with god.
Kumbakarna: He is Ravana’s brother and is granted to boon to be able to sleep for 6 months of the year and stay awake the other 6 months to eat (or something to that effect). He symbolizes the lethargy that arises from too much sleep and food, inflaming in us the qualities of rajas and thamas, preventing us from being able to worship god with a clear mind.

Indrajith: His name literally means ‘he who conquered Indra’, Indra is the lord of the devas and by winning the battle against him, Indrajith had lain claim on swargaloka and all its treasures. Indr in Sanskrit also means ‘the senses’ so in effect his name implies that he controls the senses (in a detrimental way of course). He proved to be a very difficult opponent in the war, and even managed to fell a large part of Ram’s army along with Lakshman (who were later revived by the famous sanjivni herb brought by Hanuman). Indrajith symbolizes the Maya that enshrouds us all, and technically the effects of Maya are felt by the senses (hence the name). The whole concept of Maya is created in our minds, by our ego, it leads you to believe that every thing you see, touch, feel, hear, taste is real, which further strengthens the symbolism since Indrajith is the first born son of Ravana.

In addition to this there are numerous other characters whose purpose I have not been able to understand, especially Lakshman Ram’s younger brother and Vibeeshan Ravana’s younger brother. Lakshman is the only character in the epic who sticks by Ram from the beginning to the end. Vibeeshan is the devotee of lord Ram who changes sides from his brother’s to join Ram when his pleas to avoid this war falls on deaf ears, he proves to be very useful in the war since he is aware of the strengths and weaknesses of the enemy. If any of you know what these two symbolize do enlighten me. Getting on with our story….

The Golden Deer
The outraged Soorpanakha, Ravan's younger sister, rushes to Lanka after her advances towards Ram and Lakshman result in her nose and ears being chopped off. Fully aware of her brothers love for all things beautiful she sings praises of Sita’s beauty, and at once overcome by lust Ravana speeds to the Dandaka forest where he uses the guise of the golden deer to lure Ram away from Sita before abducting her. It is at this point where Sita is separated from Ram and the foundation for the Ramayana war is laid. The three of them until then manage to lead a fairly contented life in the jungle, happy for each others company and things would have gone fine with Ram ascending his throne after the exile, had it not been for the golden deer. The golden deer that symbolizes material wealth and desires, manages to arouse in Sita, long forgotten passions and the need to posses this beautiful creature. Thereupon she pleads Ram to capture it for her, who taken aback by this request from a wife who has never asked him anything, happily complies. The deer like all desires, gives a good chase, and finally struck by Rams arrow morphs into its demonic form. This does remind one of our never ending chase behind not one, but many golden deers, every desire that we nurture and work hard to attain loses its ‘attractiveness’ once attained. This story goes to say that God has always been with us, it is only we who lose him in the race to gain material wealth, and fulfill our inner desires.

Hanuman burns Lanka
After Sita is abducted, the search for her takes Ram and his army to tip of the Indian peninsula, where they are affronted by the mighty ocean, and in order to ascertain if Sita is indeed held captive on its other shore, Hanuman is singled out to cross its waters to find her. Once in Lanka Hanuman is thrilled by the wealth and abundance of the island, but remains unperturbed by its temptations. His search brings him to Mandodari (Ravan’s wife) asleep in Ravan’s bed, and mistaking her for Sita is at once utterly disgusted. But he soon comes to his senses and further on he finds Sita imprisoned in the Ashok vatika. After pacifying Sita who is terribly grief stricken, he proceeds to Ravan’s court where he is bound and his tail is set on fire, and Hanuman leaps from building to building until the entire island is ablaze, much to the dismay of Ravan. This episode termed the sundarkand is one of the most read chapters of the Ramayana, it relates symbolically to the power of bhakthi and perseverance. Had Sita succumbed to Ravana’s threats or to his power, Hanuman would have returned to Ram and the coupled would never have been united. It was Sita’s single-minded devotion towards Ram that encouraged Hanuman to destroy the island, and weaken the will of the demon king.

Bridge Across the Ocean
Having confirmed Sita’s imprisonment Ram prays to Varuna the sea-god to allow them to pass, but Varuna refuses to go against the laws of nature but agrees to hold afloat every rock that has Ram’s name inscribed on it. The bridge is built and the army crosses the ocean to rescue Sita. The ocean represents the sexual energy inherent in us all, the first and most difficult obstacle that needs to be overcome in our spiritual journey. This ocean cannot be removed or be drained at an instant the only way through it, is to convert the sexual energy into spiritual energy. This is symbolized by the rocks, which would sink normally, floating by the power of Ram’s name. Its worthy to note than the entire army had trouble crossing the ocean, but for Hanuman – the celibate, it was only a single leap that was required.

War
The war begins on the shores of Lanka; there are a number of valiant warriors on either sides resulting in a heavy casualties. This war between Ram and Ravan is on a different level the war between the ego and God, just as the ego fully aware of its impermanence and it’s inferiority to God’s power it refuses to vanquish its stubborn hold over the soul, Ravan refuses to let go of Sita, even after he is advised to do so by his own family and subjects.

Kumbakarna
After losing a considerable part of his army, Ravan decides to arouse his brother Kumbakarna to wage war against Ram. Kumbakarna though against this idea, agrees for the sake of his elder brother and fights bravely till his death by the hands of Lakshman. This significant victory for Ram symbolizes the overcoming of lethargy and gluttony that impedes spiritual growth in an individual.

Indrajith
After Kumbakarna Ram and his army are faced with the difficult task of fighting Indrajith -a mayavi and an expert black magician. He manages to overwhelm the army with his magic, and hurts Lakshman with his magical arrows. Following this he beheads Sita in front of Ram’s eyes, and Ram breaks down thinking that all is lost. Vibeeshan later confirms it to be an illusion and Ram fights with added vigor and kills Indrajith. This is the victory over maya, the illusion that entraps every one of us and never allows to unite with God.

Ravana
Ram finally comes face to face with Ravan, although he is aided by the devas and gods in this war, Ram finds it very difficult to kill Ravan. Every time he chops of Ravan’s head a new one springs in its place, this fierce combat his ended when Ram finally takes aim at Ravan’s belly and finally manages to vanquish the demon. The terrible war between Ram and Ravan symbolizes the difficulty in overcoming the ego, and its allies, and once overcome the unison with god becomes undeniable.

Agni Pariksha
The last event in the Ramayana before Ram is crowned king, is the agni pariksha, in which Sita is finally rescued from Lanka, but is asked to enter a pyre to prove her chastity. I really don’t know what this signifies, and is a much-debated topic of the Ramayana. There are even some explanations about Agni replacing the ‘maya’ Sita with the real one, but it sounds really lame, and was probably added only to thwart any attempts to sully Ram’s character for not trusting his wife. So if anyone can throw some light on this please do so.

Joie de vivre

2008-02-05T22:34:00.000-08:00

We’ve all have had days where after a complete day of slogging at the office, or doing chores around the house, sit down to wonder why we put up with this drudgery that has come to characterize the pathetic lives we lead. When exactly did life make this ‘u’ turn and land us in this pitiful state? A hearty meal with the family has become a luxury, friends that we all promised to keep in touch with are all so distant, sleep is suddenly a waste of time and we need experts to teach us the ‘art’ of living! Every where you turn you see so much pressure, pressure to meet that deadline, pressure to get that promotion, pressure to excel in class – its suddenly as if you have to be the best, else you are a nobody. We’ve all been tuned from a very young age to be within the range of acceptability as dictated by the norms of society, and in the process we forget who we really are, and go through life constantly at war with our inner selves.

The worse affected are children, who right from the beginning are pushed to out-perform their peers until they have no choice but to hate everything about school. If only parents realize the amount of damage they do to their children in the name of education, life would be so much better. The movie “Taare zameen par” portrayed all this very beautifully, especially in the song sequence that contrasts the pressures of adult life with the mirth of childhood. Adults have never been at a loss of finding new and innovative methods to torture children, right from a chain of after-school tuitions that further the attempts to stuff bookish knowledge into the child’s head (mostly by the very same teacher), to a series of ‘extra-curricular’ classes that are supposed to make him talented. In recent times there has been a sudden surge of abacus training classes, that come up with ads like “join so and so classes and your child would be able to multiply 36974537368354 and 125423573687 in 10 seconds”. Why in gods name would a 10 year old kid need to multiply such huge number, I have not done any calculations this complicated in my entire engineering course, and I doubt a child in the 4^th standard would ever require it! I seriously don’t see the crime in using the pocket calculator; in any case the abacus is but a primitive calculator.

These harassed children, mostly never manage to live up to their parents expectations, and when they become parents, harass their children to be what their parents wanted them to be. They make it even worse by saying “ in our days we never had the luxuries that you enjoy, and yet you don’t seem to be any better”. If you really want to teach children something, teach them to handle failure, teach them to take risks in life, once these two factors are taken care of, I’m sure you’re children would be ready to face the ‘cruel’ world that we all inhabit. Talk to them about sex, cos if you don’t they will learn it from the wrong sources and end up doing something regrettable. Let them experiment with smoking and drinking, (which they will anyways) I’m sure once the ban is removed it wouldn’t be as appealing, for it’s the forbidden fruit that tastes sweeter. Well I’m no expert with children or teenagers, my only experience is having been one, so most of the stuff I’m writing is probably crap, but do let me know if any part of it made sense.

It’s of course too much to ask for, to change our old ways overnight, and follow your heart (although not impossible). All I’m saying is that its ok to what the Romans do while in Rome, but you need not be in Rome all the time, learn to take off some time for yourself and start doing the things that you always wanted to do, but didn’t find time. It really helps to do something creative; it could be singing, dancing, drawing, painting, some sport or even cooking. You don’t need expensive trips abroad or paid courses that teach you to relax, its all there within you, you just need to look harder. Whenever I feel stressed out I lock my room, switch off my phone and read a good book or call up friends and go to a movie or the beach…luckily I’m blessed with friends who turn up in the middle of the night cos they are bored and we end up playing cards or chatting, till its time to go find some breakfast. In short do the things that make you feel alive; it’s the only way to put back the joie in the vivre (please forgive my French).

me...

2008-02-02T18:58:00.000-08:00

hi,

This is my first post, so I guess ill tell u a bit about myself...well im 24, living in chennai almost my entire life-right thro school and college...very confused person, I still dont have a concrete plan/goal in life...right now working in IT (how or why I got here is still a mystery)...a mediocre artist, moderately religious, very spiritual, and still trying to figure out who i am.

The things i like are books, good food, mom's cooking, animals, puppies, dark chocolate, coconut burfi, the colour blue, early mornings, temples, the beach at night, vodka, tequilla, samosas, gold flake kings, tomato chutney, espressos, cooking, children, sweet beeda, music, bhajans, beads-rings-hippiestuff, travel, dancing(not very good at it tho), and afternoon naps.

The things i hate are hypocrisy, arrogance, selfish people, fish( not the live ones), gutkha, beetroot, rash driving, wasting food, waking up late, neck ties, traffic jams, cruelty to animals, being ill, most of my relatives, men who ill treat women, crowds, chennai summers and last but surely not the least -my boss.